Speak Up and Promote Yourself!
As women, we need to speak up more and create visibility for ourselves whether it’s in a meeting, an interview with media, or a conversation with colleagues at work. This topic comes up over and over again in my discussions with clients as well as guests on my radio show. In my recent interview with Toddi Gutner, the hesitancy of women to speak up and stand out surfaced again.
In the interview, Toddi talks about how important it is for women as a group to become more visible in the media. Visibility in the media supports and contributes to women’s leadership initiatives across all industries and government. The White House Project’s Benchmarking Women’s Leadership Report confirms the fact that women get less bylines in eleven of the top political and intellectual magazines and that this lack of visibility needs to be addressed in order for women to advance to leadership positions. Women need to be visible and credible.
Toddi also says from her experience as a reporter she finds that women are not only hesitant to promote themselves, but are also not always organized, can often ramble, and don’t come across with the same confidence as men. Men are much more declarative. They frequently respond quickly to her questions in precise, short and often quotable statements.
Both the White House Project and Toddi strongly advocate media training for women. I agree, of course, but also feel strongly that women need to learn how to promote themselves more effectively and feel comfortable delivering their message. We must get over our belief that we are bragging when we talk about ourselves in a positive manner. Certainly, bragging turns people off and, as women, we need to be especially mindful of this in the workplace. Outright bragging can sabotage our efforts to advance our careers, but done diplomatically and appropriately, it is possible to get our message across to become more visible in the organization. It is possible to learn this and do it well.
We have valuable experiences, information and stories to share. We need to speak up and promote ourselves!
Help Others to Help You
I was in Rhode Island last Friday giving a workshop on Promoting Your Brand to Rhode Island Networking to Open Doors to Jobs. I arrived early and was, therefore, able to sit in on the facilitated networking exercise at one table. All of the people at the table were highly qualified and competent individuals who held director or executive level positions before being laid off.
The facilitator at the table asked each person to give a little information about their background, their strengths and expertise, and what kind of position they were seeking. I was impressed how well each person articulated their strengths and what types of companies and jobs they were targeting for employment. Everyone around the table responded enthusiastically with potential contacts and leads for their colleagues.
We worked our way around the table to one woman who told the group that she was an architect and was now in limbo and trying to decide what she wanted to do going forward. She told the group that at this time she was looking for any type of job. Interestingly enough, the group who had previously been so helpful to others, now remained quiet. They simply did not know how to respond.
The lesson from this is: People really want to help. In fact, most people are eager to assist you in getting a new job or getting clients, but YOU need to give them enough information so that they CAN help. When we are vague and unclear about what we want ourselves, we cannot expect others to come up with the answers for us.
If you are a business owner or entrepreneur, the more specific you can be about who is your target audience, the easier it is for people to refer business.
If you are looking for new employment, be clear about what type of company you want to work for and what kind of position you are seeking.
People sincerely want to help. Give them the opportunity to be helpful.
Madam President
It’s President’s Week this week. Besides school vacation, it is also a time to honor Abraham Lincoln and George Washington; two past presidents who were a major part of our history in the United States.
The holiday this week prompted me to think as well about honoring all the women presidents who have started and are now running their own companies in the United States. These women are playing a major role in our current economy and our future history. We should take the time to honor and recognize all female presidents in business and the incredible impact they have on the economy in the United States.
Here are the facts:
- 40% of all privately held U.S. firms are now owned or controlled by women. (10.4 million firms).
- Women’s companies are responsible for creating jobs at twice the rate of all firms.
- Women’s companies are now responsible for more payroll than all the Fortune 500 companies combined.
- Women’s companies are growing profits at a faster rate than all firms.
- 420 new women-owned businesses are started every day!
Margaret Heffernen states in her book, How She Does It. Women Entrepreneurs are Changing the Rules of Business Success, “That these companies are doing so well says a great deal about female strengths and talents….These phenomenal numbers show just how effective women can be when they work on their own terms.”
To Madam Presidents everywhere, we honor you for your hard work and dedication, your commitment to your purpose and vision, and your contribution to the growth of our economy. YOU are our future.
Tune into Women Mean Business Radio on March 23rd, when I interview Margaret Heffernen.
http://www.voiceamerica.com/voiceamerica/vshow.aspx?sid=1612
Love Your Colleagues
Women have the reputation of being great nurturers. After all, we have always been primary caregivers for our family and children. It is our history. It’s in our DNA.
Here’s my question this week for professional women: Why doesn’t that love and nurturing carry over more into the workplace?
What happens to women in a work environment that holds them back from nurturing and supporting each other?
I know that women make excellent managers. We often take great care to nurture our staff, and sometimes, in fact, we take on too much work ourselves to protect our team. But how much support do we give our female peers?
In a recent radio interview I did with Gail Evans on Women Mean Business Radio, this topic surfaced. Gail spoke about how women don’t seem to help each other be successful in a corporate environment. During the interview, she told the story of one instance in her tenure as Executive Vice President at CNN that a female colleague exhibited some behavior during a meeting that Gail felt would eventually sabotage her career. After the meeting, Gail asked this woman to join her in the ladies room, and she gave her some honest feedback about what took place during the meeting and how she might approach the situation differently in the future. Gail was nurturing her. She cared enough to help her female colleague be successful. Gail’s philosophy is that if one woman succeeds, we all succeed.
How many times have you taken a female colleague/peer aside for the purpose of helping them advance their career?
It’s Valentine’s Day week. Maybe it’s time to love and nurture our female colleagues.
I would love to hear from you about specific examples you might have when you “nurtured” a female co-worker and spread the love.
What Is Your Attention Grabber?
I was in Orlando this past week with some colleagues training a medical device sales force on “purposeful communication”. “Purposeful Communication” is communication that has a goal or desired outcome and when applied to sales presentations, the objective is to create a sales presentation that is well organized around a desired outcome with your target audience.
Selling to a large or small group of potential decision makers has many similarities to promoting yourself and your business to prospective clients. One similarity is in the way you open a presentation. The opening of a sales presentation or “attention grabber” is much like the way you start your elevator pitch or promotional message.
Attention grabbers are just that. They are designed to get the attention of the audience from the start so that they will engage and listen to your message.
How effective is your attention grabber?
Here are some different suggestions on how to open your pitch to grab attention from the listeners.
- Open your pitch with a statement or question that creates some kind of an emotional bond. A good way to create an emotional bond might be to say, “Imagine yourself….. or how would it feel if….”. You can move your listener to a state of mind or emotion where they will connect with their need for your product or services.
- Ask a poignant question that demonstrates that you get their problem or challenges. “Have you ever experienced….? What do you do when….? etc.
- Share a story about yourself and your journey that connects with your business in some way. Maybe you experienced similar issues, overcame those issues and now are passionate about helping other people.
- Make a statement that has an unexpected ending or is surprising in some way.
- Use a quote or song title or lyric that people can easily identify with and fits well into your message.
Starting your promotional pitch with your name and company name is NOT a great attention grabber. You need to give people a reason to remember you before you give them this information.
Draw them in first with something that gets their attention and then talk about your business and the benefit your product or service will provide to them. NOW, they will remember your name and company!
Are You Happy at Work?
In this current recession, one would think that anyone who has a job at this point would be happy to be gainfully employed. Research tells us that this in not the case. In fact, in a recent article in The Wall Street Journal, author Sue Shellenbarger speaks of a growing need and trend for “happiness coaching” in the workplace.
Shellenbarger says, “Employee satisfaction has hit the lowest level in the 22 year history of the Conference Board’s annual survey on the topic. Only 45% of U.S. workers are satisfied with their jobs, down from 52% in 2005 and 61% in 1987, says this 5,000 household study.”
The recent emphasis on “happiness coaching” at work is supported with business cases that show employees’ positive attitudes are good for business. Companies with more satisfied employees earn higher profit and better customer satisfaction ratings and their employees miss less work.
According to Shellenbarger, “A 2001 study at the University of Michigan says people who are experiencing joy or contentment are able to think more broadly and creatively, accepting a wider variety of possible actions…..”
Let’s face it. We all experience some degree of dissatisfaction with our employment at one time or another; that’s reality. The focus of this current trend of “happiness coaching” is to create your own contentment and joy from within. The premise is that if you are happy with yourself, you are less likely to be affected dramatically by negative influences. Your inner peace creates a shield in a way from any external negative forces.
Any activity or practice that helps you achieve this inner contentment and joy is recommended; exercise, yoga, meditation, daily success or gratitude journals. All of these contribute to a positive state of mind.
For women, it is especially important to learn to “let go” of the negative influences at work whether they be conflict with a co-worker or your boss. “Letting go” of negative emotions and conflict is often a challenge for women. This affects their job satisfaction.
Focus on what is meaningful about your work. Look for ways to infuse your life with positivity. If there is too much dissatisfaction with your current position that it is impossible to find anything positive, it’s time to move on. Life is too short.
Just make sure that you don’t bring your negative frame of mind with you to your next job!
Create a Great Elevator Pitch
Have you ever been to a networking event where everyone needs to stand up and introduce themselves? I don’t know about you, but after about 3-4 people stand up and recite their elevator pitches, I can’t remember who does what. Very few of them capture my attention. Even less of them are memorable. They all sound alike because everyone is using the same approach, the same boring approach.
How then can you distinguish yourself? How can you stand out in the crowd?
We all want to sound professional, but in our quest to be professional, our pitches often fall flat. The goal of a good pitch is to attract clients and be memorable. So how do you create a great message; one that is effective and “sticky”?
I find that most of the pitches I hear do not have the “sticky” factor. And many of the pitches are very difficult to deliver. They are too technical or too wordy and, therefore, lose the audience. Some of the pitches are too vague. Sometimes we use jargon that no one understands in an effort to sound professional. The end result is that people may think we’re smart, but they have no idea what are business is.
Here are some tips on how to create a great elevator pitch:
- Your message should be authentic. Don’t use a lot of jargon or professional language that is off putting. You won’t connect with people this way.
- Your message should be personal. Tell your story. People love stories and they remember them.
- Put energy and passion into your message. Let people know that you love what you do. Don’t you want to work with people who love what they do?
- Make an emotional connection with you message. Identify the need and pain of your target audience so that people can easily identify with what you provide and they will remember you.
- Make your message easy to deliver, conversational. Don’t write a speech that you need to memorize and recite. It doesn’t sound authentic. It’s boring.
- Stimulate curiosity. Give a teaser or enough information so that they want to learn more about you.
- It might be appropriate to make it light and fun. Try using cliches, song titles or quotes to begin your pitch and get people’s attention.
Promotional messages take time to create. Start big, not small. Brainstorm and write down all your ideas about how to present yourself and THEN review your notes and pull out sound bytes to craft a great message.
For more tips on how to create a great elevator pitch, listen to my Women Mean Business show, Tune Up Your Pitch. On the show, I coach 3 women entrepreneurs through a process to tune up their pitch!
www.voiceamerica.com/voiceamerica/vepisode.aspx?aid=43836
Coping with Fear and Anxiety
This is a guest post from Art DeLorenzo, CFP, ChFC, CLU, MSFS, a retired Group Vice President at a Fortune Magazine top 100 firm and Frederic Luskin, Ph.D. a psychologist at Stanford University. Mr. DeLorenzo, Dr. Luskin and Dr. Rick Aberman are co- owners of MYT Group, LLC. MYT is an emotional competence development programs. Details about this program can be found at www.maximizeyourtalent.com.
Here are some thoughts and tips on how to cope with fear and anxiety to help people understand the impact that fear and anxiety have on them physiologically and emotionally and then some steps to help deal with those feelings.
Things to Know:
1. It is natural to feel anxious during financially stressful times so do not think that you are alone or that you are odd. It is natural and there is nothing wrong with you for thinking in an anxious way. A recent TV interview between Donny Deutsch & financial newscaster Larry Kudlow revealed that Mr. Kudlow was no more prepared for the onset of the recent market collapse than you and I were.
2. It is natural for the brain to create fear and anxiety. Therefore experts surmise the brain is trying to protect us by bringing a difficult situation like the economic crisis to our awareness. When in our awareness the brain is saying find a solution because there is something wrong here. You can read more about this in Margaret Wehrenberg’s book “The Anxious Brain”.
3. Psychologists distinguish between fear – which has a specific cause (the Saber Tooth Tiger finds you in the woods) and anxiety whose cause is more general and vague.
4. Anxiety creates cognitive distortions according to Myra S. White a clinical instructor at Harvard Medical School who focuses on workplace performance. Cognitive distortion weakens our judgment which causes decision-making to be impaired. Bottom line – we make more mistakes.
5. When we experience cognitive impairment from anxiety we do not listen as well and instructions need to be repeated more often and our memory is weaker.
6. When we are cognitively impaired we tend to have shorter fuses and we often feel impatient.
7. When we are cognitively impaired we tend to obsess about the past and/or worry about the future both of which impair our present performance.
8. If during a stressful time like this you are not cognitively impaired, you may become so if someone else in our office has high anxiety. That occurs through a process known as emotional contagion according to Professor Sigal G. Barsdale associate management professor at the Wharton School of Pennsylvania.
9. Anxiety wrecks havoc on the body and the mind according to psychologist Dr. White.
10. According to a study released by CNN in mid March of 2009, 8 of 10 Americans are experiencing stress over the economy as evidenced by their concern over their jobs and their perceived loss of their life style.
What can you do?
1. Encourage your people to express their anxieties openly so that leaders can provide honest information about what is occurring. The leader of the group can convene a meeting so that individuals have an open opportunity to share their thoughts and fears. Set a start time for the meeting and an end time. Explain that once the meeting is over, everyone is advised that “worry time” is over until the next meeting and productivity time is at hand.
2. Be strategic about your anxiety. When you experience it, acknowledge it and then practice stress management so that you can move on. Take two or three slow deep breaths into and out of your belly and relax.
3. When you catch yourself back in your anxious spot, remind yourself that you were there before and it is not necessary to remain there. As a practice: Consider the difference between the mind, the brain, & the body. The mind controls what the brain does. So if you remind your brain, to be grateful or optimistic it will do just that. When you do this the body receives less stress hormones and your mind stays clear. Imagine then your body says to your brain, wow, less adrenaline…thank you.
4. Remind yourself on a regular basis that right now you are fine. You are healthy. Your loved ones are healthy. You have food, water, and shelter. Today, at this moment, there are no real threats to your safety and the safety of your family. Fear is not needed and you have the tools to deal with your anxiety.
5. Create a meditation and or regular exercise routine. Both produce natural mood elevators that will dispel the symptoms of anxiety according to Dr. White.
Some of this information came from a NY Times article written by Phyllis Korkki on Sunday, October 19th on page 11 in the Business Section.
Are You in Career Quicksand?
Does this describe you?
- Desperately trying to keep your job or business from swallowing you up?
- Totally focused on completing all your daily tasks but never getting through your to do list?
- Working nights and weekends to catch up?
- Stressed? Exhausted?
- Do you find the more you struggle to keep on top of things, the more you sink into the abyss?
I call this career quicksand. Why? Because when you are in this situation with your business or career, you are stuck and I mean really stuck! The consequences of this are that you are not in the position or frame of mind to move your business or career forward. When you are in career quicksand, you cannot think clearly or objectively. As long as you are totally focused on daily tasks, you do not have the time or energy to be creative. All your energy is expended on daily survival.
What would it take for you to extricate yourself from this trap and begin to think more strategically?
Here are some tips to pull yourself out of the quicksand:
- At least once a day, take some time to do something totally different from work; anything that will clear you mind. Ideally, scheduling even a few short breaks (10 minutes) during the day helps to keep up your energy and stimulate your creativity.
- Work with a coach or mentor. This partnership can give you a new perspective on your business and career. The potential to see things more objectively offers a great opportunity to get “unstuck”.
- Start an Affinity Group at work. Gather a group of like-minded women together on a regular basis to discuss and brainstorm on work place challenges and opportunities.
- Schedule regular networking meetings (lunch, dinner, coffee) with peers outside of your own company. It’s amazing what wisdom is available from other business owners or women in similar corporate positions.
- Keep your mind open to new approaches through a variety of resources. There are many insightful and valuable books on business management and leadership. (Let me know if you would like some suggestions). There are also many worthwhile online resources.
The first step to getting “unstuck” is to realize that you ARE stuck and that the consequences of this are detrimental to the growth of your business and career. You simply can’t move forward if all of your energy is focused on daily tasks and survival.
Look for ways to pull yourself out of the quicksand and think strategically about where you want to go and how best to get there.
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Also, check out my new January teleclasses:
Promote Yourself to Success (3 one hour sessions). $99. Class limited to 6
Learn how to create an effective and memorable message and practice with your peers!
for more information and registration:
http://womenssuccesscoaching.com/services/group-coaching/
You’ll Never Know Until You Ask
Is No really NO or is it an opportunity?
Women are much more likely than men to take a “no” as a personal rejection and final answer. In fact, the fear of rejection will often keep us from asking for things we rightly deserve.
Let’s look at the situation of a salary negotiation or performance review. Perhaps we were expecting a large raise and only received a small one. How often will we say “thank you” when we receive the small raise even though we thought we deserved more? It is possible that this presents a missed opportunity. It could be that “no” means ” not right now” or even a possible “maybe”.
Does the possibility of rejection keep you from asking for more and continuing the discussion about how and when a larger raise is possible?
How often in your career have you held back from asking for something (a promotion, flex time, a raise, a new office, etc) because you feared rejection?
If you are interested in a promotion for example, don’t assume that your boss knows what you want. You may be very disappointed when you are passed over for that job. Make your intentions well known. State your case. What is the worst thing that could happen? If he/she says “no” to the promotion at least you know that you stated what you want and now there is an opportunity to find out more about why this position is not right for you at this point in time and what you can do to get the necessary skills for a future position. Perhaps it will open up a door for mentoring or coaching or other resources for you.
You never know until you ask.
In 2010, make this a resolution. Ask for what you want and need. “No” is not always a definitive “no”. It can often be an opportunity to gain more information.
You will never know until you ask!
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Also, check out my new January teleclasses:
Promote Yourself to Success (3 one hour sessions). $99. Class limited to 6
90 Day Action Marketing Group (6 one hour sessions). $99. Class limited to 6.
for more information and registration:
http://womenssuccesscoaching.com/services/group-coaching/
